Looks like I'm going to have some free time on my hands this October. Thanks a lot, Mets. No, it's cool, it's not like I actually enjoy watching playoff games. I appreciate you saving me the trouble of having to do so. I thought it was just bad luck that you kept hitting into double plays or giving up 7 runs in the first inning, but I understand now that you were really just trying to protect me from what could have ultimately been an even bigger disappointment at the hands of the Rockies. Much appreciated, boys. Le sigh. Though I have to say, watching Kaz Matsui single-handedly destroy the Phillies was a lot of fun for me. I almost forgive him for never hitting a grand slam with the Mets because he pulled it out at exactly the right time last night. I spent a lot of time this morning darting in between the bathroom and the TV, trying to flat iron my hair and see Kaz finally doing something worthwhile on a baseball diamond during the 7am SportsCenter. So the question becomes, what do I do with all this free time? How do you fill an empty October? Keep in mind I already have a Halloween costume (will be reprising The Pirate for the 6th consecutive year, see profile picture) and I don't like apple picking. Answers: 1. Watching Friday Night Lights, discussing it endlessly, and badgering everyone around me to do the same. Ever since they took Veronica Mars off the air I've been all dead inside and unwilling to throw around my "Best. Show. EVER." label, mourning the tiny blonde detective full of sassy. And then Borders put the Friday Night Lights DVDs on sale of $19.99 and within three episodes I was already at the point where just hearing the theme music (which is conveniently played over the load menu on the DVD) makes me cry. And I'm not a crier, unless there's a Hallmark commerical on that has dads and daughters or one of those ASPCA commercials with Sarah McLaughlin and the sad puppies. Listen, this show is out of control good. I don't even like football-- particularly not high school football, which carries with it strong associations of my junior year of high school when my class decided to vote, in an overwhelming majority, a male student who only spoke 5 words of English into the Homecoming Princess spot and the Least Likely Homecoming Court Occupant girl into the Prince spot--and I think this show is the best thing on earth. If you watch two hours of this you'll be attached to these people for life. And this season, it's on (duh) Friday Nights, so that's a great little mneomnic device for those of you who don't color code your day planner and live in fear of your DVR having its memory erased. My mom recently got tivo and I found myself telling her "I frequently find myself categorizing my life to this point as Before I Got DVR and Since I Got DVR. It's really made me a much more efficient television enthusiast." Which is a complete joke, since all it's really done is allowed me to keep episodes of True Life way past their emotional expiration date, but still. 2. Carefully crafting my entry for the People's Sexiest Fan contest. I've long said that my problem with sports broadcast journalism is that there's not enough People Magazine in it. Yes, I want to know what the score is, but I would also like to know who has a sixteen year old daughter that just announced she's bringing her 23 year old boyfriend to the prom, and how that's going to affect daddy's game on the field today. Just once I'd like to see Perez Hilton with a headset on mapping out all the girls Derek Jeter has given herpes to (google it, trust me). I have never, however, thought that we needed more sports in People magazine. I think People is great just the way it is, and remains my go-to source for articles about cats who can predict death. People seems to disagree, though, and has come up with this: https://peoplesexiestfan.secondthought.com/register1.jsp (Sorry, I'm having trouble embedding links. I do know how to do that, though. I might not be able to network printers, despite the volume of requests I get to do just that due to my printer-adjacent cube location at work, but I generally can get links up. Just FYI). Basically, all you have to do to enter this thing is give them a picture and thirty words. Thirty words is effectively two sentences (when you have the addiction to parenthetical asides that I do) so I'm going to assume that they're putting more weight on the picture. And judging from the sample pictures they've provided, it looks like they're leaning toward the "nice looking to unremarkable" end of the attractiveness spectrum without any hints of remote sexiness, which rules out my original idea (wearing a Mets bikini and standing in front of the American flag) and my backup idea (wearing a Mets tshirt rolled up to bra level with "#5" written on my stomach in lipstick surrounded by a heart). I'm sure I'll come up with something. As for the thirty words, I think I'm going with "Because I cried more when they traded Al Leiter than I did when my dog died. And I really loved that dog."